I AM VIRGIN „Movie”

Directed by Sean Skelding
Starring Adam Davis, Ron Jeremy, Melinda Ausserer, Maren McGuire, Dawn McCall
90 Minutes
www.Iamvirginthemovie.com

After a virus turns the world into sex-crazed vampires, Robby is the only human left on the planet. Robby has survived becoming a fang fucker through keeping his wang dry. In other words, Robby is a virgin. That doesn’t mean that he isn’t tempted, though.

Just like the film I AM LEGEND, which this movie spoofs, Robby searches the streets for survivors. Accompanied by this Basset Hound, Billy, Robby drives through the abandoned streets of Portland, looking for “adventure.” Each time Robby pays witness to fang bangers getting it on; he is spotted and then has to fend off the advances made by the beautiful tattooed-stripper vampires. Every time Robby runs away frightened, with his tail, or um….something else between his legs. He is afraid of becoming a vampire, and he wants his first time to be special.

I AM VIRGIN masquerades as a Comedy/Sci Fi flick, but really it is nothing more than a soft core porno. Other than Ron Jeremy’s filthy-tongued part, Robby’s evasion from a twirling dick-on-a-stick and his three-titted, two-vagina blow up doll, the movie features few laughs. Also, there is no action or special effects to warrant a Sci Fi tag.

The girls are hot and the sex scenes should produce a rise, but why give us soft core. The directors should have gone all the way and given us the ‘ole in-and-out.
I AM VIRGIN is scheduled to hit cable television. Expect to see a better than average film late night on Skinamax.

note: 3/10